Many of you have asked or heard about Toby’s mom. I started writing a fiction piece sometime ago based on his and her stories…..Feel free to leave any constructive criticism. You can view the actual facts of the case that he has on his site. This was published here sometime ago; however, I’ve moved it to the top due to various request. www.LindaEdwards.com Please feel free to comment. Also, please go “like” his Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/pages/Linda-Edwards/210182355749034
It has been said that young children don’t remember. I remember. I remember things that the police don’t want or refuse to listen too. I remember things that only make sense to me now that I am an adult. I remember the day they told me that mom was never coming back.
I remember looking up at my mom. She was so tall I had to stretch my neck way out to look up at her. I could see the sun shining around her lighting up her hair and her smile. I thought she looked like an angel. She always had a smile for me even when I was in trouble. I still miss her. It has been thirty-one years and I still miss her.
There are so many questions. As a child, I was told that my mom had gone on vacation and I would be staying with my dad. In reality, she was missing. Children believe what they are told. I was totally unaware of the massive search. I was unaware for almost six months. Six months of wondering why mom would go away and not take me. Six months of thinking I had done something to displease her and that was why I didn’t get to go on vacation. Life went on. I attended school, played and enjoyed staying with my dad, but always, in the back of my mind I wondered.
After they told me that mom had gone to heaven and wouldn’t be coming home, I cried. One day I was allowed to cry and after that I had to suck it up and be a man. It wasn’t enough. It didn’t answer the questions. I was scared. What if I done something to make my dad mad? Would he go away forever? What if I wasn’t good? Would they send me away? I grew quiet and withdrawn. I had anxiety attacks when I was left with the sitter afraid that nobody would come back and get me and still life went on.
As time passed, I grew rebellious and like many of the teens where I grew up, I tried to test my boundaries. Drugs, alcohol, fighting and other things all in an effort to get the attention I needed. I spent days and months grounded from seeing my friends, from leaving the house, from talking on the phone. An entire summer grounded. It was a relief when school started an escape from home. School offered me a way out of the house. Twelve years passed and I was finally eighteen years old. At eighteen I learned that I was going to receive a settlement as a result of my mom’s death. It devastated me. How could a check compensate for twelve years without a mother? I fell into great depression and old habits. The money ran out and I had to face reality.
Reality checks hit everybody at one time or another. Mine caused me to go back to Arkansas to the town of my mother’s death, get a job and search for a killer. I knew who it was and I just had to prove it. This quest gave me a new lease on life, a reason to straighten up and do what needed to be done. August 1990, fourteen years to the day from my mother’s disappearance I arrived back in Hot Springs, Arkansas.
You know I enjoy your writtings. I think you are a very talented writer but what I like is the fresh perpective you usually have. I think you could write a book about this notrouious murder. I think it could be a best seller. I think it could show the world the corruption and lies that would take a little boys mom forever and free the killer. Step back and write this, don’t get caught up by the writing Ann Rule or Mara Leveritt. Do what you are good at tell the story. Maybe it will end up being a little funny, not funny haha but funny that it has been so obvious all these years that a few powerful people in a small town have allowed injustice to reign for your family for over 30 years.
Just my thoughts – I think you could do a great job at this.
This writing really left me wondering what was going to happen next. The details were so great that i felt like i was watching a detective show like forensic files. The writing really makes you think about how difficult an upbringing might be for kids that lose parents at an early age. Overall i really enjoyed reading this piece and it kept me interested for the next paragraph throughout the whole thing.
– Ben Marello
Ben,
Thank you. Remember when reading from a critical analysis view you want to also mention what could have improved the writing.
I really enjoyed this writing. It made me want to look into the story you are referring to. I cant imagine a parent or guardian coming up missing and being left in confusion. This also made me want to read more about what happened after they made it to hot springs. Did he prove the mothers killer? Is there another writing after this? If there is there a link to go with it?
I haven’t developed this story yet. My husband’s website http://www.lindaedwards.com has a lot of detail. My instructor commented that this story is in telling mode rather than showing mode. Can you tell the difference between showing vs telling?
Well, now I have to go to read the whole story because it makes me crazy not to know the ending – I feel as though that’s a sign of good writing. For me anyway. Very easy to read. As I was reading, I felt as though I could be in this person’s shoes. It felt like a natural story being told. Not choppy at all, and very descriptive. I can’t personally relate to this person’s experience, but by reading this, I feel like I can understand that person. The last paragraph in this seemed powerful. It started and ended with the sentences being shorter, and straight to the point, so obviously there was more emphasis on it. Also, first paragraph, the word “too” might be changed to the “to” with one “o.”
Sarah, I like this version; however, my instructor showed me that I am telling the story instead of giving the story an active voice. Can you tell the difference in show vs tell?
My favorite context to read is mystery and this is mystery. I really want to know what happened the parent. Like did the parent get killed or are they just missing forever or are just being kidnapped as a way to get payback or something. The details are awesome at leaving you clueless and wanting to know exactly what will happen next. I see nothing that needs to be changed or improved.
I want more because this story is a sad, but pretty good overall. The fact that this story is coming from the heart of someone that lost a person that carried them around for nine months is tuff. I like how he described how beautiful his mother was. Another thing I like is, he telling the story in order from when the incident happen to when he was a teenager. It makes me want to read more and find out what actually happen.
I like this story a lot because it tells the story of a little boy who misses his mother and grows up and the one thing on his mind is to find the person who killed his mother. This is such an interesting story and I would love to hear if anything happens after he moves back to Hot Springs and if the killer was ever caught.
I love mysteries and that is exactly what you give me. I would like to know more about the mother and her daily life that could have potentially led up to her disappearance. The description of her is so life like that I feel like I know her. I would like to know how your search went looking for the person who destroyed your childhood. I would like to know if you ever found the killer giving you a sense of justice being served. These are the things I wonder. I want to know more and more, because this is right up my alley. I am left hanging.
I enjoy your Short stories. I enjoyed This one more in particular because it’s true and very personal. Though i know your husband is damaged from this event he grew strong through all the mistakes and misunderstandings he received from people that told him to brush it off. That was not right. I know their intentions were meant to be for his well being. Though he had some rough years he found a way to cope with the death of mother and that is truly amazing he is a strong person to pursue the case to capture the murderer and go about life that it was not his fault.
Although this story is very sad, is a very good suspense story, because i have too many questions and that makes me waiting for the second part of the story and who killed her? why the killer kill her? What relationship did the killer have with Linda’s family? I am very sorry that this story is a real story, I the imagine the pain, the anguish, and the desperation of the family for know the true.
I loved this story!!! my husband an i laugh so much. Is my autobiography, I work with children and I love to make these kind of jokes, they are so innocent that everything you tell them believe, but I never thought that maybe I also left the memory of one these little children.
This is a heartbreaking story. It shows how sometimes adults, while trying to protect a child from the devastating truth, actually cause more damage in the end. We need to be more aware of kids feelings and try to include them in what really goes on. We need to help them heal along with us. Perhaps the burden would be lighter when shared with others. The many questions the child in this story had could have been answered as they arose, instead they ended up pilling up, ending in frustration, anger and rebellion.
This story made me think more about how to approach a child in case of a family tragedy.
You never think it’s going to happen to you or someone you love until it does. It’s too common a thing for boys to be told “suck it up, be a man” when someone they love and will never get the opportunity to see again disappears. I watch a lot of ID and I can totally understand wanting to take the case into your own hands because well, no one is going to get the job done the way you would yourself.
Has the killer been caught??
This story made me do research when I was done. I had ever heard of this before, This is extremely sad. It strikes a cord with it having real roots. It draws you in and keeps you hooked. It makes you think or your own mother and even call her up and tell her how much you love her. Being a child and being a part from your mother is an unsettling feeling, but then you add in the fact that she never comes back. It would already be hard to process as a child, but not knowing what happened to her is hard to process as an adult. I would like to have know more after Toby returns to Hot Springs though. I guess that will be a story for another time.
This was interesting! I have never heard about it.The conflict is huge in this story and seems as if it could be ongoing. Im sure you could pages on this topic and dig much deeper. I think the theme has a lot to do with betrayal and courage. you were feeling betrayed by being lied to about your mother and about her killer not being punished, and the courage to keep fighting for what you believe.
This was a very intriguing excerpt! I left me, like the narrator, with a lot of questions. The secant paragraph were you describe the way he remembers his mother is beautifully written. My only comment would be the first sentence of the third paragraph. “There are so many questions.” ‘are” is present tense. Although it’s clear the narrator still has a lot of questions in the present the rest of the paragraph talks about questions he developed as a child(in the past.) For example why his mother would go on a trip without him. I think if the sentence was past tense it would flow better.